Skip to main content

10 career mistakes women make

From Nice Girls Still Don’t Get the Corner Office By Lois P. Frankel 

Do you work hard but are struggling to get ahead in your career? Do you look at women who have reached the pinnacle of their careers and wonder what their secrets to success are? Do you wish there were more female role models who could mentor you? Do you wonder what you can do to make people take you more seriously in the workplace?

If these questions have crossed your mind, you are not alone. Lois P. Frankel, author of Nice Girls Don’t Get the Corner Office and its sequel, is an executive coach and has helped many professionals for over 20 years. In her book she explores 133 common mistakes women make and provides coaching tips to rectify the behaviour or attitude. While we explore 10 of these tips, the book is best used as a handbook to refer back to often.

1. Pretending it’s not a game 

The workplace much like any other game has rules. Think of the popular TV series Game of Thrones which tells of warring factions in their quest for power upon the Iron Throne. In many ways the workplace can feel like this - you will encounter allies and enemies and by strategising, growing your credibility and reputation, building relationships and using your influence you can effect a positive outcome. The mistake women make is that they want everyone to win. Playing the game of business doesn’t mean you want others to fail, but it is competitive. You need to figure out what the rules are and develop strategies to make them work in your favour.

<TIP> Learn to play chess, it will help you develop a more strategic mind. Observe the rules in your workplace – these are usually unspoken expectations. 


2. Overlooking the importance of mentors and sponsors 

The difference between a mentor and a sponsor is the level of involvement. A mentor is typically someone who gives advice and guidance to help you grow your career, field or company. Sponsors advocate for you in your absence and introduce you to the right people who may help you further your career. 

<TIP> Find out if your company has a mentoring programme. Lois suggests you get a male and female mentor as they will provide different insights, based on their experiences. If your company doesn’t have a mentoring programme, ask someone whom you admire if they are prepared to mentor you for 30 minutes to an hour a month. 


3. Working hard 

 “Women have to work twice as hard to be considered half as good.” 

Women tend to work hard - but it is a myth that you will get promoted because of hard work. Likeability, strategic thinking, networking and being a team player are just some of the elements to crafting a successful career. Each company has a baseline for hard work. When you consistently go over the baseline you are not always recognised but given more to do because you’ve shown you can and will do it. 

<TIP> Allow yourself some time to build relationships. Define your work hours and stick to them. At the beginning of each day identify what you want to accomplish and resist the urge to tackle whatever comes across your desk. 


4. Doing the work of others 

Women have a tendency to not only take on their own work but also that of others. You have a responsibility to your company to deliver high-quality products and services BUT it is not your responsibility alone. While you might be doing the grunt work, others will be getting ahead by building their careers. 

<TIP> Stop volunteering for low-profile, low-impact assignments. Recognise when people delegate inappropriately to you. Practise saying unapologetically, “You know I’d love to help you but I’m swamped”. Resist the urge to qualify this with a reason. 


5. Sharing Too Much Information (TMI) 

Whether on social media or in person, be wary of oversharing. Whatever you post on Facebook, Twitter or Instagram in a momentary lapse of judgement can be reshared before you’ve had a chance to delete it. It is not uncommon for prospective employers to check your social media profiles. When it comes to personal information, the less you share the better. 

<TIP> Use social media to your advantage - to help build your brand and grow your networks. 


6. Feeding others 

The act of feeding is equated with nourishing, a stereotypically feminine attribute. Whether you have a jar of sweets on your desk or bring leftovers to share with colleagues, unless this is part of a deliberate strategy, you could be put into a ‘box’ by others. 


7. Believing in the myth of work-life balance 

The concept of work-life balance is old-fashioned and people now refer to work-life integration, which is about how you integrate the two aspects into your life as a working woman. Technology has made it possible for us to be ‘always on’. We have the convenience of checking our email on our cellphones and taking calls while out of the office but this also makes it more difficult to switch off and keep our work and home lives separate. Find the happy medium that works for you. 

<TIP> Practise being more present - or mindful - whether at home or at work. Focus on the task at hand, rather than trying to do too many things at the same time. Focus on quality and not quantity. 


8. Build your brand 

Every interaction you have with someone contributes to how they perceive you. It is imperative that you are the author of your brand and are able to distinguish yourself. 

<TIP> Prepare an elevator speech that encapsulates who you are, what you love doing and your value to the company. Give your goals, your strengths and your ambition some thought as this is bound to come up in conversation. 


9. Not soliciting enough feedback 

Feedback from colleagues, friends or your boss is a good way to get insight into your unconscious behaviour. Ask for feedback if you are genuinely interested in taking it onboard and using it constructively.

10. Dress for success 

Lois dedicates a section of her book to building your brand, which covers how we physically present ourselves to the world. A recent study argued that women who wear a full face of make-up to work every day are more likely to succeed, that women who are “well groomed” send unspoken signals that they take care of themselves and exude more confidence.

<TIP> How you dress or wear your hair/make-up is a personal choice so do what works for you. Confidence comes from within and you are more likely to exude this when you are comfortable in your own skin. 

The book is available at most book stores or search for it online.

Comments

  1. Nice read, many truths and daily struggles us women face! #CornerOfficeHereICome

    ReplyDelete
  2. Love the tips. # Chess over Scrabble from now on :-)

    ReplyDelete
  3. Check out this free course on Salary negotiation for women in the workplace https://www.futurelearn.com/courses/negotiation-for-women-in-the-workplace

    ReplyDelete

Post a Comment

I'd like to hear what you think about my posts, so leave me a comment...

Popular posts from this blog

Hiking the Noordhoek Peak Circuit in Silvermine

An easy 7km trail that is kid and dog-friendly My love affair with Silvermine Nature Reserve, part of the Table Mountain National Park, started four years ago when we hiked the Noordhoek Peak Circuit. I absolutely fell in love with the place - so much so that almost every Sunday, come rain or shine, you can find us exploring one of the Reserve’s trails.  Naturally when we got Kygo, our exuberant Rottweiler, we took him along on our hikes. Kygo was built with adventure hard-coded in his DNA. He absolutely loves water, swimming and outdoor adventures, and Silvermine offers all of this.  Kygo and I at the Noordhoek Peak Circuit looking out over Hout Bay About the Noorhoek Peak Circuit The Noordhoek Peak Circuit is a 7km hike that you can comfortably complete in about 2 and a half hours. With an elevation of 754m at the Peak, it offers spectacular views of some of Cape Town’s most amazing beaches. This hike is incredibly beautiful and as you are walking there are so many different aspects

Klaasenbosch is a delightful trail for a walk with your dog

People often ask how I know about so many trails and the truth is some of them are discovered in a serendipitous manner. Klaasenbosch was one of those amazing ‘by chance’ discoveries and has quickly crept up our favourite list.  We were doing the Alphen Trail one day, and we usually start at the bottom of Alphen Drive and walk all the way to the top of the trail. As we came out on the other side at Hohenort Avenue, we saw another trail board across the road and decided to try it. The rest is history... Waleed and Kygo exploring in the early morning light Walking the Klaasenbosch Trail For the Google Maps directions to Klaasenbosch - click here As you start the trail, the verges are the backyards of properties that have stables and depending on the time of day that you walk, we often see people horse-riding. There are no cyclists allowed, which makes it a popular spot for dog walking and trail running. The view of Klaasenbosch A great place to take your dog for a walk It is a short 3km

8 highlights from The leader who had no title

A modern fable on real success in business and in life by Robin Sharma  I attended Robin Sharma ’s presentation at the Cape Town Convention Centre in 2013, which was part of his promotional tour for his book The leader who had no title . I first encountered Robin as one of the ‘talking heads’ in Rhonda Byrne’s The Secret and again when a very close friend of mine gave me his earlier book The monk who sold his Ferrari as a gift. But meeting Robin, when he autographed the copy of my book, was surreal as he embodies what he ‘preaches’. He is unbelievably humble, easy to talk to and has no sense of self-importance. Much like The Monk who sold his Ferrari, The leader who had no title is written as a fable. Although the characters and story are fictitious, the lessons and learnings that are shared are true and 100% applicable to anyone’s situation. The leader who had no title is told through the journey of Blake Davis, the protagonist from New York, who had a good upbringing but